Soul(mate) Searching with Dating Apps
Motivations for Online Dating App Use AmongstStraight and LGB Emerging Adults
Katrin Sieber, 11757396
Master Thesis
University of Amsterdam
Graduate School of Communication Supervisor: Annemarie van Oosten Date: June 27th, 2018
Table of Contents Abstract ... 1 Introduction ... 2 Theoretical Framework ... 3 Methodology ... 9 Results ... 13 Conclusion ... 27 References ... 28 Appendix A ... 33
Abstract
As dating apps become more and more popular, motivations for using these platforms have become an increasingly common topic of research. However, research on motivations for dating app use amongst LGB individuals, especially within the emerging adult demographic, is limited. The experience as a sexual minority member and the process of coming out propose possible differences in motivations of LGB individuals compared to straight individuals, which have been heavily focused on in previous research. The current study aims to address this gap. Individual in-depth interviews were conducted with fifteen LGB and straight online dating apps users between the ages of twenty-one and twenty-six. The role of dating apps in their lives was explored, especially in relation to the characteristics of emerging adulthood and the process of coming out. Five main motivations for using dating apps were identified, namely romantic relationship formation, meeting new people, satisfying sexual desires, instant attention gratification and identity exploration. Most straight participant considered dating apps as a means to expand their opportunities beyond their offline lives in relation to meeting people and dating. However, most LGB participants viewed dating apps as their main source of connecting with people from their sexual minority communities. Additionally, straight participants viewed dating apps as a tool for exploring their personal identities by seeking out new experiences in their love lives, while LGB participants indicated to use dating apps as a way to explore their sexualities and connect with other LGB individuals throughout their coming out process.
Introduction
Online dating apps have become increasingly popular since the rise of smartphones over the past five years (Smith, 2016). Dating apps in general, are designed in a way that allows users to connect with each other, whereupon they can communicate and eventually establish different kinds of relationships, such as simple online acquaintances, casual hook-ups, and even serious romantic relationships (Hobbs, Owen, & Gerber, 2017). Despite the wide use of dating apps, these platforms have become especially popular amongst the emerging adult demographic, with 22% reporting to use proximity dating apps in 2016, compared to 5% in 2013 (Timmermans & De Caluwé, 2017; Smith, 2016). Additionally, it has been found that 13% of all couples that moved in together between 2008 and 2013 have met through online platforms, in comparison to 1998 and 2003 when this was only the case for less than 2% (CBS, 2014). Considering these trends, it is expected that the use of online dating apps will continue to grow and become increasingly integrated into the lives of individuals (Rosenfeld & Thomas, 2012). As such, it is interesting to consider the motivations that emerging adults have when using online dating apps. So far, existing research has focused on adolescent and general adult samples, however, studies focusing on motivations for dating app use amongst emerging adults beyond hooking up are still limited. This particular demographic is especially interesting, as emerging adults seek out new experiences in order to develop and grow, such as having their first serious relationships, and exploring their personal identities (Arnett, 2004). By looking at emerging adults’ motives for using dating apps, connections can be made to the characteristics of the stages of emerging adulthood as outlined by Arnett (2004).
Moreover, studies focusing on LGB (lesbian, gay, and bisexual) samples are not as widespread as research on straight samples. Due to the affordances of online platforms, such as a
certain level of anonymity and the ability to filter out users based on gender, digital spaces such as dating apps have been found to serve as beneficial means for LGB individuals to seek same-sex partners (Gudelunas, 2012). However, based on the affordances of dating apps, other motivations have also been identified amongst LGB users, such as identity exploration, coming out, and bonding with other sexual minority individuals (Craig & McInroy, 2014; Bond, Hefner, & Drogos, 2009). Findings on individual sexual minority groups within the teenage and general adult demographics already exist (Craig & McInroy, 2014; Bond et al., 2009; Gudelunas, 2012). However, studies focusing on samples consisting of LGB emerging adults, as well as the role of dating apps throughout their coming out process are still absent.
By including straight as well as LGB participants in the present study, comparisons can be made about differences in motivations based on sexual orientation. In order to explore the
contributions of online dating apps in the lives of straight, as well as LGB individuals, the process of coming out and the developmental stage of emerging adulthood, the following research
question has been formulated: How do emerging adults who identify as heterosexual, gay, lesbian, and bisexual compare in their motivations for using online dating apps?
Theoretical Framework Unique motivations of LGB emerging adults
Although research on dating app use motivations is becoming increasingly
comprehensive, it is important to note that previous studies on this topic have commonly focused on straight samples, wherein only gender was a distinguishing factor, or other samples in which sexual orientation was not explicitly taken into account. Additionally, although emerging adults have been targeted in research on dating app use motivations, only few studies have been based on the specific characteristics and needs as outlined by Arnett (2004), and have also ignored
possible differences based on sexual orientation. Hence, it is interesting to look into motivations that take into account a variety of sexual orientations amongst a sample of emerging adults in order to find out whether results may differ in such a case.
First and foremost, it is vital to understand the concept of emerging adulthood, as this developmental stage constitutes the age demographic that participants will represent. The term emerging adulthood, coined by Arnett (2004) refers to the life stage that usually takes place between the ages of eighteen and late twenties, and is characterized by five traits: identity exploration (trying out diverse possibilities, especially in the areas of love and work), instability (feeling unstable and unsettled), being self-focused (putting oneself first and focusing
predominantly on oneself), feeling in-between (experiencing a transitional stage between adolescence and adulthood), and exploring possibilities (when hopes flourish and individuals have unique opportunities to shape their lives).
In addition to the standard challenges of emerging adulthood, LGB emerging adults may face further developmental task, in particular the process of coming out. Coming out, or the process of disclosing one’s sexual orientation often occurs during adolescence (Cox, Dewaele, van Houtte, & Vincke, 2011). Nevertheless, for LGB individuals more extensive exploration of one’s sexual identity is found to occur predominantly during the life stage of young or emerging adulthood (Cass, 1979). The process of coming out has been conceptualized by many authors through the establishment of sexual identity development models, which are characterized by specific stages during which individuals achieve certain tasks. Taken together, these amount to a distinctly developed sexual minority identity (Moe, Reicherzer, & Dupuy, 2011). A fundamental theory of LGB identity development was established by Cass’s (1979), whose model proposes six stages of coming out, namely identity confusion, identity comparison, identity tolerance, identity
acceptance, identity pride, and identity integration. In the context of the emerging adulthood characteristic of identity exploration, which includes exploring one’s possibilities within the areas of love and work (Arnett, 2004), LGB individuals may experience this phase as even more
complex and challenging due to the additional stages of the coming out process (Cass, 1979) that they are faced with.
The internet may be considered a space through which young individuals form parts of their identity, as it gives them the opportunity to express and explore their identity (Marwick, Diaz, & Palfrey, 2010). According to Hillier and Harrison (2007), LGB youth use new media “in productive ways to prepare themselves for living their sexual difference in their immediate physical worlds”. Especially, as experimenting with digital means of coming out can assist with approaches in the offline lives of LGB individuals, it is important to consider how initial online experiences can in turn influence subsequent offline experiences (Baym, 2006). Due to the significant interconnectedness between online and offline lives, especially amongst millennials, i.e. today’s emerging adults, the relationship between online contexts, experiences, and activities and offline life must be considered (Gray, 2009). For LGB individuals, exposure to negative experiences, heteronormativity, and marginalization in their offline lives may limit their access to information about sexual minorities, which in turn could negatively impact their ability to explore their identity (Pascoe, 2011). It is in such cases that online resources may be beneficial tools that allow LGB users to self-express and develop their identities, which as a result may positively influence their offline relationships and experiences (Guan & Subrahmanyam, 2009; Marwick et al., 2010). Such exploration may take place on particular online platforms, such as dating apps. Dating app use amongst LGB individuals: Motivations relating to emerging adulthood and the coming out process
One theory that relates to motivations for using online dating apps amongst emerging adults, as well as how this plays into their personal development and the coming out process, is the Uses and Gratifications Theory. This theory was first established by Katz, Blumler, and Gruevitch (1973) who defined it as the investigation of users’ motivations for utilizing mass media and the ways in which they are utilized. In comparison to other types of media effects theories, Uses and Gratifications Theory is an active audience-centered approach that focuses on media users and their active selection, as well as their inherent needs that stimulate media
adoption (Haridakis, 2002; Rubin, 1993; Rubin, 2009). Additionally, this theory aims to
understand how individuals behave towards these media, as well as the functions or repercussions of their particular needs when seeking to fulfill them through the affordances of particular media (Katz et al., 1973). In sum, Uses and Gratifications Theory provides a basis for this study in that it explores how and why individuals generally choose to use certain media to fulfill certain purposes. When considering the particular medium of online dating apps within the context of Uses and Gratifications Theory, past research has explored general motivations of individuals for using such platforms. Based on previous research, three overarching categories for motivations have been identified amongst users of dating app, namely social, physical, and psychosocial motivations (Valkenburg & Peter, 2007; Van De Wiele & Tong, 2014).
Firstly, social motivations are often prevalent amongst online dating app users. This refers to the need to establish relationships, both on a platonic, i.e. friendship, as well as romantic level (Hart, 2015; Ranzini & Lutz, 2017; Timmermans & De Caluwé, 2017). Although online dating apps provide users with a space to find romantic partners, many studies have identified the common motivation of seeking friendships, or simply looking for people to meet and spend time with (Hart, 2015; Ranzini & Lutz, 2017; Timmermans & De Caluwé, 2017). In such cases, sex
and intimacy are not the priority, but rather companionship which is achieved by building
platonic relationships between people who have common interests (McWilliams & Barrett, 2014). Due to the features of online dating apps, which are typically elements such as a personal
description field and the option to include multiple personal images, users are able to easily identify other users with whom they may have things in common whereupon friendships can easily be formed (Timmermans & De Caluwé, 2017). Furthermore, seeking friendships through online dating apps has been found to be a more common motivation amongst women than men (McWilliams & Barrett, 2014). With regard to seeking romantic relationships through online dating apps, aspects such as sex, intimacy, and love are at the forefront (Sumter, Vandenbosch, & Ligtenberg, 2017; Park, Kee, & Valenzuela, 2009). This motivation is based on the need to find a long-term partner and build a committed relationship with them (Xie, 2007) and is common amongst both men and women (Rosenfeld & Thomas, 2012).
Subsequently, physical gratifications which users seek out through the use of dating apps refers most prominently to sexual needs, i.e. arranging real-life encounters with the intention of pursuing sex or “hooking up” (Clemens, Atkin, & Krishnan, 2015; Ranzini & Lutz, 2017; Sumter et al., 2017; Timmermans & De Caluwé, 2017). Online dating platforms are increasingly sought out as a source for finding sexual partners in order to achieve instant gratifications (Gudelunas, 2012; Hobbs et al., 2 017; Timmermans & De Caluwé, 2017). However, men have been more frequently found to have this motivation when using online dating apps (McWiliams & Barrett, 2014).
Lastly, online dating app users are also found to have psychosocial motivations, which focus on needs that are originally based on psychological factors but are also connected to social elements (Valkenburg & Peter, 2007). More specifically, psychosocial needs can be understood
as experiences or sensations, such as thrill or excitement (Gudelunas, 2012; Van de De Wiele & Tong, 2014). Furthermore, seeking validation and self-worth evaluation through online dating apps have been identified as common reasons for using dating apps amongst individuals, especially with regard to appearance and attractiveness (Ranzini & Lutz, 2017; Timmermans & De Caluwé, 2017). In other words, some psychosocial motivations partially revolve around the need to feel good about oneself. Additionally, psychosocial needs can also reflect the desire to detach oneself from real-life in order to avoid unfavorable realities, i.e. escapism (Clemens et al., 2015).
When considering these motivations for online dating app use, many of them can be linked to the characteristics of emerging adulthood defined by Arnett (2004). The physical and social motives of love, romance and sex strongly relate to the traits of identity exploration and being self-focused. These are characterized by a willingness of emerging adults to explore themselves in terms of sexuality and gain experiences on their own terms, without having to take other people into account such as parents and peers, which is common during adolescence. Additionally, emerging adults often engage in more serious romantic relationships during this life stage which relates to their willingness to explore various possibilities. Hence, dating apps
provide emerging adult users with a space in which they can easily explore their preferences, find partners and fulfill their romantic and sexual desires. Instability is also often reflected by dating app use motivations, such as the concept of escapism. As emerging adults are often faced with new situations for the first time and are confronted with the realities of adult life such as
maintaining a job and managing financial responsibilities amongst others, online dating apps may serve as an environment in which they can temporarily avoid their struggles and the feeling of being in-between.
The three overarching motivation categories, namely social, physical, and psychosocial, are expected to be reflected by the findings of this study. Additionally, several of the sub-motivations outlined above which constitute these overarching categories are also likely to be recognized, such as romance, sex, and thrill seeking amongst possible others. However, it is also expected that several new and previously unidentified motivations will be discovered, due to the unique group of LGB individuals which are included in this research. As LGB emerging adults experience the process of coming out and straight people do not, it is interesting to consider possible motivations that relate to this process, such as how online dating apps may play a role in facilitating identity exploration when coming out, also in comparison to offline. In particular, online dating apps may serve as a space in which LGB individuals can explore their identities through interactions with others who may be in the same position or have had similar
experiences. Existing research has not explored the contribution of dating apps to the coming out process of LGB emerging adults and how they may assists in providing a space for closeted emerging adults to safely explore their sexual identities and how this may relate to the social bonds they create online.
Furthermore, the qualitative approach of this study allows for exhaustive personal insights to be gained. By conducting in-depth interviews, detailed private information can be gathered and explored, which may garner more specific information regarding the LGB experience when using online dating apps and their reasons for using them in the first place. In doing so, conclusions can be drawn about the affordances of such online spaces and how these relate to motivations of LGB individuals to use online dating apps.
Methodology Procedure
The first stage of recruitment took place through convenience sampling, specifically by contacting individuals from the personal network of the researcher. These participants were reached through social media, communication apps and phone calls, whereupon the first 9 interviews were conducted. Subsequently, a second recruitment stage took place, during which additional participants were contacted through snowball sampling. This was done by asking the initial pool of participants during their interviews for possible referrals of potential eligible contacts who may be interested in taking part in the study. Through this approach, eight additional contacts were acquired, whereupon six were recruited for further interviews. Twelve interviews were held at the researcher’s home in Rotterdam, as these participants were based in Rotterdam. As the researcher’s home is centrally situated, the location was especially convenient for participants. Time and date of appointments were scheduled based on the
convenience of the participants. Additionally, the living room setting provided a comfortable and relaxed atmosphere where participants could feel safe and free to speak openly about personal thoughts and experiences. Furthermore, three interviews were held in private rooms at the Erasmus University Rotterdam, Woudestein Campus at the convenience of the participants, creating an academic research atmosphere. Snacks and drinks were provided during all interview sessions in order to make participants feel welcome and at ease. Furthermore, all participants were rewarded for their time with a gift voucher for the online shop bol.com valued at 5 Euro.
Interviews were semi-structured and conducted on the basis of a pre-developed interview guide (see Appendix A). Individual interviews were deemed more appropriate for the study at hand, as the topic of online dating and personal development is of very personal nature. Hence, it was determined that a one-on-one setting would me more comfortable for participants and render
more detailed and complete disclosure of information, as compared to for example focus groups (MacDougall & Fudge, 2001). All interviews lasted between thirty and sixty minutes.
Sample
Female Male Currently using DA* Used DA in the past In a relationship formed through DA Heterosexual 3 2 3 2 2 Homosexual 3 5 6 2 2 Bisexual 2 - 2 - -
*DA = dating apps
The total of 15 participants, distribution of genders, and variety of sexual orientations ensured data saturation while also generating higher validity. Additionally, all participants ranged between the ages of twenty and twenty-eight, making them part of the emerging adult
demographic, i.e. eighteen to late twenties (Arnett, 2004). Laddering interviews
In order to gain insights on participants’ personal experiences with using dating apps and how their motivations for using them linked to their physical, social, and psychosocial needs, a laddering interview technique was employed. In doing so, it was possible to explore both implicit and explicit selection criteria, such as motivations, by asking participants questions starting with “why”, e.g. “Why did you start using dating apps in the first place?”. By formulating questions in this way, participants were able to shift the focus in their responses from specific technical features of dating apps and how these contribute to their use, to more abstract principles that are of importance to the users, i.e. deeper motivations related to personal development and social
affordances. Through this approach, participants were urged to think about and express qualities and values that reflected their deeper personal motivations for using dating apps.
Analysis
An iterative approach was applied during the data collection and analysis process of this study. Through this method it was possible to continuously collect and analyze data as the
research progressed rather than first collecting all data and subsequently analyzing it (Humphreys & Liao, 2011). As such, emerging themes were able to be identified from the completed
interviews and could then be further inquired about in the following interviews. In doing so, credibility of the findings could be increased (Lincoln & Guba, 1985).
The sensitizing concepts of social, physical, and psychosocial motivations, were
determined during the development of the theoretical framework and interview guide, and served as guiding concepts during the data analysis. These contributed to the coding process which was based on a grounded theory approach (Glaser & Strauss, 1967), meaning that throughout the coding process, individual patterns, categories and themes were identified (Bowen, 2006).
The software program Atlas.ti was used to analyze the data. To begin with, transcripts of the interviews were segmented into separate parts, whereupon open coding techniques were applied in order to label the data in form of quotes, motivations, and experiences that participants expressed. Upon completing the coding of each interview, certain open codes were re-coded as to eliminate multiple codes with the same meaning resulting in standardized codes across all
interviews. Next, themes were established based on codes with similar meanings. Themes included relationship formation, meeting new people, satisfying sexual desires, instant attention gratification and identity exploration. Lastly, patterns and links were made between themes based
on codes and notes that were documented during the earlier phases of the coding process, as well as throughout the interviews.
Sensitizing concepts
Sensitizing concepts can be used as a guiding tool when arranging and interpreting qualitative data (Bowen, 2006). For this study, social, physical, and psychosocial motivation categories were utilized, as they have previously been identified as overarching themes in relation to motivations for dating app use (Valkenburg & Peter, 2007; Van De Wiele & Tong, 2014).
With regard to social motives, participants were asked about what kinds of relationships they had formed with other users following online, as well as offline interactions. In relation to physical motives participants were asked about possible sexual desires and how they fulfilled these through the use of dating apps. Lastly, psychosocial motivations were explored by asking questions regarding mental well-being and how dating apps enabled participants to seek instant gratifications, as well as explore their identities (see Figure 1).
Results
Based on the main theme of motivations for dating app use amongst straight and LGB emerging adults, and the three sensitizing concepts of social, physical, and psychosocial
motivations, a total of five subthemes were identified. Results of the data analysis revealed five main motivations that straight, gay, lesbian, and bisexual emerging adults had in common: social motivations included (1) romantic relationship formation and (2) the desire of meeting new people; the main physical motivation was to (3) satisfy sexual desires; and with regard to
psychosocial motivations, (4) instant attention gratification and (5) identity exploration were most prevalent (see Figure 1). Additionally, differences based on gender and sexual orientation were identified between groups across the five respective themes.
Figure 1. Concept indicator model. This figure illustrates the main concept’s dimensions and their respective indicators.
Social motivations
Social motivations are based on the need to establish relationships, both platonic, as well as romantic. In this context, dating apps serve as a space to meet new people with various
intentions, such as making friends, dating, falling in love or simply having online interactions and exchanges with other users. This overarching motivation relates both to strictly online
relationships, as well as relationships that were started online and later shifted into participants’ offline lives.
Romantic relationship formation. Several respondents stated that they use Tinder in the hopes of finding a partner in order to form a committed relationship. One straight woman and one bisexual women even stated that they hoped to find a partner for life. Nevertheless, all
participants mentioned that they are aware that many dating apps often have the image of a hook-up platform, hence, all of them were wary of the intentions of other users they matched with when interactions are in the early phases.
Nora, 21, straight: “Even though I’ve gone on several dates with guys through Tinder, I’m still kind of skeptical whenever I first match with someone because, like, I know a lot of guys are just looking for a one-night-stand. I usually chat with a match for like a few days before I can be sure if he’s being genuine or not.”
Based on sexual orientations, there were clear differences in the way that Tinder serves a platform to seek a romantic partner. Straight, lesbian, and bisexual participants stated that Tinder served as a means to extend their network and possibly meet potential partners beyond their immediate circle of contacts, however, they still seek partners in their offline surroundings as well. Gay participants, on the other hand, said that they rely almost solely on dating apps, as many of them had little to no experience searching for partners offline. Additionally, several gay participants were currently in relationships or had previously been in relationships with men whom they had met through dating apps. Only one of them stated that he had formed a past relationship with an offline acquaintance.
Alfredo, 22, gay: “I’ve had two boyfriends and both of them I met online. […] I’d rather find a boyfriend online. Being able to just randomly approach any guy in public is just something that I haven’t known, I haven’t really experienced it. Straight people can walk up to other people and make a move whenever they want, but for gays, you never really know who you can
approach. So I prefer dating apps. ”
Furthermore, LGB participants mentioned the benefits of certain dating apps being aimed at users based on sexual orientation, and that filters for sexual orientation exist. Such affordances eliminate the guesswork that is often required in the offline world, especially amongst LGB individuals. Additionally, gay participants in particular stated that dating apps provide them with a safe space. Due to still existing negative stigmas, gay men felt that approaching or flirting with
men in the offline world without knowing their sexual orientation can be risky. Hence, dating apps provide a solution to this issue, as they offer gay users the ability to filter out other gay men, without the risk of confrontation or hostility.
Nadine, 22, bisexual: “There’s definitely less guesswork, like, it's difficult to know if a girl is just being friendly or if she actually likes you as more than just a friend. So dating apps make you feel like you have more options because at least I have found it's quite difficult to find girls who like girls in real life.”
David, 26, gay: “In the offline world, how can you tell that someone is gay? You can't just approach someone and ask them. I mean, you'd probably get a punch in the face. On dating apps it's like a community. We're all the same, we're all looking for the same thing more or less
depending on the app, so yeah, it’s harmonious. So going online just takes away that risk a little bit because you already know the people you’re talking to are gay.”
Meeting new people. Many participants explained their motivation to make new acquaintances through dating apps. Platonic connections were especially desirable in situations where participants sought to integrate into a new environment, or when they wanted to meet locals and receive “insider tips” while travelling.
Regina, 21, bisexual: “When I went on exchange, of course I met a lot of exchange students and stuff, but I also wanted to get to know local people so then dating apps were really nice. Through Tinder I actually met some cool people that showed me around the city and whom I actually developed like a friendship with.”
Additionally, several gay and lesbian participants stated that dating apps served as a means to make connections with other people of their same sexual orientations, in the hopes of forming friendships with them.
Tom, 21, gay: “At my high school there was only one other gay guy and maybe some people who weren’t really out yet. And because of that, I really wanted to try to meet new people that were sort of the same as I was. So yeah, dating apps were really useful for that, I even met two of my best friends through dating apps who I am still friends with to this day.”
Physical motivations
Physical motivations refer specifically to the need to fulfill sexual desires. In other words, this motivation is based on how participants utilize dating apps in order to arrange offline sexual hook-ups when in need of instant physical gratifications.
Satisfying sexual desires. The hook-up aspect of dating apps was quite divided. Some participants were very much into the option of finding casual offline sexual partners, while others did not use dating apps for this purpose at all. Predominantly men favored using dating apps to find sexual partners, both straight and gay, while only one lesbian stated to also share this motivation.
Sander, 24, straight: “I think when I was like nineteen or twenty I started using dating apps a lot, like very very regularly because I was single and I was living alone and at university, and you know I just went a bit crazy, embracing the freedom, so I used dating apps to hook-up with girls and I ended up having quite a few one-night-stands.”
David, 26, gay: “The fact that you can get a hook-up, like, instantly can be really
appealing. I would just start chatting with a guy, tell him I’m horny and within a few minutes I’d be on my way to his place. And we’d literally just have sex and once the deed was done, I’d leave.”
Furthermore, gay respondents made clear distinctions between the apps they prefer to use in order to fulfill their sexual desires, as different apps have different reputations. This results in different types of users with different intentions depending on the respective platforms.
Mario, 23, gay: “I feel like Grindr is more for like hook-ups, I know there is Tinder and Tinder is seen in the gay community as less like, you know, sexually charged. Like, people usually go there to really get to know somebody, maybe like build a relationship or friendship. Grindr I think everybody believes that it's more of a sex thing. You go there just to, you know... go meat shopping, that kind of thing, if you know what I mean.”
Psychosocial motivations
Psychosocial motivations focus on needs that are originally based on psychological factors but are also connected to social elements. Within the context of this study, these
motivations refer to how participants engage on dating apps in order to instantly achieve desirable feelings, and to explore their personal identity and sexuality. This motivation is only based on online interactions.
Instant attention gratification. This motivation was described similarly by nearly all participants. Significant differences based on sexual orientation were not present. Overall, participants resort to using dating apps when seeking positive attention, validation, and
confidence boosts, often when participants found themselves in a negative state of mind. These instant gratifications were always mentioned within an online context and refer strictly to the idea of satisfying these needs in the moment, rather than shifting into the offline experience.
Iris, 25, straight: “I feel like if you get a match, it's like just a confirmation of self and being desirable. […] So when you're having a bad day and you go on Tinder and manage to get a lot of matches, of course that's a great boost of confidence. It's like getting a nice compliment
from someone, just that you don't have to wait for someone to actively give it to you but you can go get it yourself in a way. So basically, it's this instant self-gratification at your own command.”
Nadine, 22, bisexual: “I’m not always that successful in my dating life and sometimes, if I haven’t been on a date for a while, it can be nice to just go online and match with some people because you know you’re going to get some compliments and be flirted with. […] It’s like getting a quick fix of something you need in that moment.”
Furthermore, the option to use dating apps as a pass-time activity or game that can provide entertainment and relieve boredom was also frequently mentioned.
Yara, 25, lesbian: “With Tinder it can also be nice to just swipe around and see who's there, so I guess it's a lot about the activity of swiping as a pass-time, it's like a fun game.”
Identity exploration. Predominantly gay men stated that they were able to explore their identities through the use of dating apps. Although the majority were already certain of their sexual orientation, they used dating apps in order to anonymously find and speak to other gay men in order to discuss their feelings and their experiences with coming out.
Tom, 21, gay: “I think it was sort of self-discovery because I could also speak to other people about being gay and what it meant for them, like if they were still in the closet or not, and how people were dealing with their own things. I also chatted with people who lived in cities and had different experiences compared to me because I’m from a small town. So maybe it was also easier for them to meet like-minded people compared to me, so it really helped to have a space like that while I was coming out.”
Straight participants also used dating apps in order to explore their identities, however, more so from the perspective of wanting to gain new experiences as emerging adults and discover
their personal preferences, often after first leaving their homes and living independent lives while working or studying.
Dominic, 24, straight: “When I first left home and moved to the city for university, dating apps really allowed me to date many different girls and sort of explore what I liked sexually, but also emotionally, like maybe in a future partner. So now I’ve had both good and bad experiences but partially thanks to Tinder I’ve learned what kind of girls I can properly connect with.”
Additionally, two straight females mentioned that they had tried using dating apps to filter for women in order to explore the possibility of being attracted to other women.
Anna, 24, straight: “I tried looking for other women through Tinder once actually, but I quickly realized that I'm just not attracted to women. But the filtering function gave me the
possibility to explore that option. I was curious, I thought to myself ‘ok, this is something that I've never tried out. Who knows? Maybe I'm gay?’. So yeah, Tinder made me realize that I'm not. But it's just a really private space where I felt comfortable to do that.”
Discussion
The current study explores motivations for dating app use amongst straight and LGB emerging adults, and draws comparisons based on sexual orientation. Previous research on the topic has predominantly taken a quantitative approach and focused heavily on heterosexual samples. Additionally, studies concentrating on sexual minorities have mainly explored gay male samples and not drawn comparisons based on others. It is also noteworthy that studies focusing on motivations amongst emerging adults are limited and few have identified specific motivations beyond “hooking up” across this particular demographic. As such, this study seeks to contribute new findings by creating a better understanding of the motivations that straight and LGB
emerging adulthood. Additionally, the role of dating apps in relation to the coming out process of LGB individuals is investigated, in order to gain insights on how dating apps may contribute to the exploration of one’s sexual minority identity.
This study identified five major motives for dating app use that straight and LGB emerging adults had in common, namely romantic relationship formation, meeting new people, satisfying sexual desires, instant attention gratification and identity exploration. These categories are in line with the social, physical and psychosocial motives identified in previous research on dating app use motivations (Valkenburg & Peter, 2007; Van De Wiele & Tong, 2014).
Additionally, these motives overlap with multiple characteristics of emerging adulthood outlined by Arnett (2004), however, especially with regard to identity exploration, in that all participants utilized dating apps to explore their possibilities within love and personal partner preferences. With regard to the LGB participants in particular, dating apps served as a means to explore their sexual identities and facilitate their coming out journey. The findings contribute new and in-depth knowledge about the role of dating apps in relation to identity exploration amongst emerging adults in general, and specifically with regard to the coming out process of LGB individuals. Characteristics of emerging adulthood and motivations for dating app use
One common motivation for using dating apps was related to romantic relationship formation. This is linked to the emerging adulthood trait of uncertainty and feeling in-between (Arnett, 2004). Respondents did not always feel like they were ready for a committed
relationship, despite using dating apps as a tool to find a potential partner. Furthermore, participants were not always prepared for the responsibilities that come with being in a serious relationship, as they enjoyed the freedom during emerging adulthood that allowed them to casually date and arrange sexual hook-ups.
However, when distinguishing based on sexual orientation, it was evident that straight participants regarded dating apps as an additional means of extending their options to find
partners beyond acquaintances from their offline surroundings. By comparison, LGB participants stated that the technical feature to filter out other users who share the same sexual orientation facilitates their opportunities to find a future partner, an affordance of dating apps that has been identified in previous research on LGB dating apps use (Bond et al., 2009). Furthermore, most gay men stated that they barely had any experience searching for romantic partners offline, due to existing negative stigmas. The potential risks that go along with flirtatious approaches amongst gay men in the offline world have been found to be a common concern amongst this sexual minority in past research, however, online dating apps have the ability to eliminate this risk due to filtering features (Gudelunas, 2012). This exemplifies how the challenges of the identity exploration phase of emerging adulthood (Arnett, 2004) may be more pronounced for LGB individuals. While straight emerging adults can explore their possibilities in love relatively freely, LGB individuals may feel the need to find suitable and safe spaces when seeking out potential partners, both online and offline.
The motive of using dating apps to meet new people on a platonic level was voiced by participants of all sexual orientations. Especially for participants who were exposed to a new environment and were looking to integrate into a new social circle with people whom they could bond and share common interests with, dating apps were described as a useful tool to achieve this goal (McWilliams & Barrett, 2014). As in previous findings, participants also stated that they would often determine whether they would swipe for another user based on their descriptions, which usually feature personal information, as this would increase the chances of having things in common and being able to establish a personal connection (Timmermans & De Caluwé, 2017).
Based on Arnett (2004), this is a common practice amongst emerging adults, who go through a stage of instability during which they often change residences and relocate, and seek to establish new social networks. Differences based on sexual orientation were similar to the previous motivation of seeking a long-term romantic partner through dating apps, as LGB individuals found that these platforms allowed them to more easily seek out other members of their respective sexual minority communities and extend their social networks within those groups (Craig & McInroy, 2014).
The physical motive of satisfying sexual desires through dating apps was mentioned frequently by both straight and gay males, as well as one lesbian female. This motive has been found to be especially prominent amongst male dating app users (McWiliams & Barrett, 2014). All participants who raised this point stated that they had the desire to fulfill their physical needs, for which dating apps served as an efficient tool to find partners for offline sexual hook-ups. This reflects the emerging adulthood characteristics of being self-focused and exploring one’s identity, which entail putting one’s own desires first, as well as gaining new sexual experiences (Arnett, 2004). Differences based on sexual orientation did not exist for this motivation, besides gay men emphasizing the distinction that gay men make between specific kinds of dating apps depending on their motivations, i.e. Grindr for sexual hook-ups and Tinder for meeting new people and looking for relationships.
Seeking out instant attention gratification online falls under the overarching psychosocial motive, and was frequently mentioned by most participants with no variations based on sexual orientation. Participants indicated that during times when they found themselves in a negative state of mind, they would often resort to using dating apps in order to receive positive comments based on appearance and physical attractiveness in order boost their confidence (Ranzini & Lutz,
2017; Timmermans & De Caluwé, 2017). Furthermore, this motivation refers specifically to online interactions that do not shift into the offline experience of participants. Seeking out such validation from others also relates to the stages of feeling in-between and instability (Arnett, 2004). As many emerging adults are faced with important decisions and often for the first time find themselves confronted with serious responsibilities, feelings like lack of self-esteem and stress can be common. Hence, participants often found it satisfying to utilize dating apps in order to be able to feel good about themselves in a specific moment.
Lastly, most participants indicated to use dating apps for various forms of identity exploration. Although past research on psychosocial motivation does not explicitly include identity exploration (Valkenburg & Peter, 2007; Van De Wiele & Tong, 2014), this motivation is based on psychological factors but is also connected to social elements. As the emerging adult stage of identity exploration consists of experimenting with different possibilities and discovering different facets of one’s personal identity (Arnett, 2004), this motivation has been classified as part of the overarching psychosocial theme within the context of this study. Straight participants stated that dating apps gave them the opportunity to explore various new possibilities, especially in love in terms of gaining new experiences with the opposite sex and discovering their
preferences in a future partner. In some cases, dating apps even enabled straight participants to experiment with other sexual orientations. Furthermore, many straight participants stated that experiences with new partners also helped them learn things about themselves, such as how to deal with relationship challenges and how to become better partners themselves by improving on personal flaws. LGB participants frequently mentioned that dating apps enabled them to explore their sexualities during the coming out process, especially in relation to the stages of identity tolerance and identity acceptance states, during which LGB individuals seek out peers, explore
the community of their sexual minority and become more involved with them (Cass, 1979; Craig & McInroy, 2014).
Dating apps as a tool during the coming out process of LGB individuals
With regard to the process of coming out that LGB individuals are faced with, many participants indicated that they utilized dating apps as a space to meet people whom they could speak with during this process. In this sense, dating apps serve as a space where LGB individuals can feel safe to communicate with other people and share their thoughts and experiences, as well as seek support. Additionally, the possibility to stay anonymous on dating apps was regarded as especially beneficial, as it allowed users to express themselves and find support without having to disclose their identity. This is often the case during the stage of identity tolerance described by Cass (1979), during which sexual minority individuals seek out people who also identify as sexual minorities, in order to exchange their experience and receive advice.
Although bisexual and lesbian participants indicated to rely less on dating apps during their coming out experience, due to tolerant social environments and being aware of sexual minority communities in their offline surroundings, they felt that dating apps were mainly practical to connect with members of their sexual minority community in situations when they had relocated and felt the need to integrate into a new social circle, as well as a facilitator when seeking out potential same-sex partners. By comparison, several gay males stated that dating apps served as a helpful tool before, as well as after coming out to their closest friends and families. For one, other users provided support and advice prior to coming out, but also afterwards in order to integrate into their sexual minority community, particularly in cases where other gay men were not present in their direct surroundings. Additionally, gay males who stated to use dating apps as a means to find sexual hook-up partners indicated that they had not gone through the sexual
exploration stage during their late adolescence, which many heterosexual teenagers tend to do at that stage. Hence, using dating apps as emerging adults allowed them to experience the sexual side of the identity exploration phase as outlined by Arnett (2004), usually after leaving home following secondary school.
Limitations and suggestions for future research
The current study explored motivations for online dating app use amongst straight and LGB emerging adults. Due to the face-to-face setting and level of sensitivity of the interviews, which included topics such as love, sex, identity exploration and coming out, it is possible that participants gave responses that were socially desirable. One example of this occurred when one participant said that he started to use dating apps due to peer pressure from his friends. However, later in the interview he discussed how dating apps helped him find regular sexual hook-up partners while he was getting over a painful break-up. As such biases and the willingness to give socially desirable responses cannot always be avoided, it is advisable to consider other study designs, such as anonymous online surveys in order to increase the truthfulness of participants’ responses concerning their online dating motivations and experiences. Nevertheless, this qualitative approach allows for depth and detail in the gathered data, while also enabling participants to expand on their responses, making it possible to uncover topics not initially considered.
Furthermore, it is important to note that the five individual motivations identified in this study, in many ways create an overlap between the three overarching motivations of social, physical, and psychosocial. Despite the distinctions made in previous research (Valkenburg & Peter, 2007; Van De Wiele & Tong, 2014), the five motivations in this study have many characteristics in common, as social, physical, and psychosocial motives tend to be
interconnected on certain levels. An example of this is as the connection between the motivations of forming romantic relationships, satisfying sexual desires and identity exploration identified in this study. Despite each being categorized one of the three overarching motives, all of them relate to each other in that romantic relationships also include a physical, i.e. sexual aspect, as well as the possibility to explore one’s identity through gaining experience with a partner. As such, it is advisable to potentially revise these three overarching motivation themes and redefine them by taking the common elements into account.
Conclusion
In sum, dating apps were found to be a significant means amongst LGB participants to explore their sexual identities, as well as their personal identities as emerging adults. Past
findings state that LGB individuals use various online platforms simply to interact with others in order to prepare to come out in their offline lives. However, the findings of this study indicate that despite also having the online ability to provide support from peers during the coming out process, dating apps in particular frequently served as a means to connect with other LGB individuals in order to shift these interactions into the offline world. In doing so, LGB participants aimed to connect with other LGB individuals both on a platonic level in order to integrate into their communities, but also to gain sexual and romantic experience with same-sex individuals that they had often lacked before the stage of emerging adulthood, particularly amongst gay males. When compared to LGB individuals, this study has also shed light on similarities and differences in the role of dating apps in the lives of straight emerging adults. It was discovered that these platforms allow straight individuals to also expand their social
connections, however, merely as means to go beyond their offline peers, rather than networking with people from specific communities. Additionally, it was found that dating apps facilitate the
identity exploration of straight emerging adults. Although most straight participants did not use dating apps to explore their sexual orientations as compared to LGB individuals during their coming out journeys, they did find these platforms useful in order gain experience in their love lives, resulting in deeper knowledge about their preferences for a potential partner.
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Appendix A Interview Guide
Introduction
Based on the brief, you know that this interview focuses on your use of dating apps. More specifically, I am curious about your particular reasons for using dating apps.
Description of Behavior & Use Topic 1:
Description of Use and Behavior on dating apps Goal 1:
Gain insight on dating app presence and habits
Introduction: To begin with, I would like to hear a little about your usual dating app use and habits.
Initial question:
-
Why did you start using dating apps in the first place? Subsequent:-
Do you still use dating apps?-
How regularly do you use dating apps?Motivations Topic 1:
Motivations for dating apps use
Goal 1:
Gain insight on participant’s reasons for using dating apps
Goal 2:
Learn about their (changed) expectations
Introduction: In addition to this, I am also interested in your reasons for using dating apps.
Initial question:
-
Were there any particular reasons for starting to use dating apps?Subsequent:
-
Did you have any expectations upon signing up with your preferred dating apps?-
How have these expectations changed since when you first signed up?-
Do dating apps serve any other purposes for you, than just social interaction/dating?-
How have dating apps helped you explore your identity/sexuality?Topic 1: Online experience Goal 1: Gain insight on personal experiences with and expectations of other dating app users
Introduction: In addition to learning about your reasons for using dating apps, I am also curious about your experiences.
Initial question:
-
What has your experience with dating apps been like? Subsequent:-
Have your initial expectations from when you signed up been met?-
Do you meet up with your matches?-
Do you chat with your matches? If so, what do you usually talk about?-
Do you usually initiate conversations or the other way around?-
When chatting with a match, what do you look for in a conversation?Topic 2: Offline experience Goal 1: Gain insight on the role of dating apps in participant’s real life Goal 2: Discover attitudes towards online dating
Introduction: I am also interested in how dating apps play a role in your life when you’re offline.
Initial question:
-
Do you discuss your Tinder experiences in real-life? If so, what do you talk about and with who?Subsequent:
influences elements of your offline life?
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