The woman as the intermediary between clans

The mythical stories also reveal other aspects of the status and role of Batak men and women.

The realm of the gods can be equated with the marga perpetuated through the male line. The male gods, Mula Jadi Na Bolon and his sons, do not leave the upper world. They do not have to endure the trials and tribulations in the middle world which are Si Boru Deak Parujar’s lot.

But just as the marga is dependent on women to forge its relations with other marga to become a part of the Batak social order, so are the gods dependent on a woman to become the deities of men. It is therefore not surprising that it is Si Boru Deak Parujar, a woman, who has been assigned the role in Batak mythology to create the earth and give birth to the first human beings, her opposite-sex twins. In order to fulfil her destiny as creator and procreator, she has to leave the abode of the gods and descend to the world below, where she marries and gives birth to her children.

The analogy with the woman’s role in the arrangement of marriage is obvious. Si Boru Deak Parujar is the first Batak daughter who leaves her family of origin and the village of her father’s marga to go to another village in the middle world. All Batak women born after her follow the same trajectory. They ‘marry out’, leaving their family of origin. It is they who must adjust to a new and unknown environment, the marga and family of the husband. They go

28 Although not represented in the mythical stories, sexual chemistry is not absent at all in traditional Batak culture. Batak erotic poetry speaks the language of sexual attraction between the sexes (Chapter 3, page 17-8).

through a process of psychological alienation and adaptation never demanded of their brothers.

Batak women must make this sacrifice in order to fulfil their destiny, to become a wife and mother, just like Si Boru Deak Parujar.

Si Boru Deak Parujar also gives meaning to the status of the bridetaker (marga boru) versus its bridegiver (hulahula). Here we come across yet another hierarchical relationship. In the eyes of the bridetaking family, the bridegiving family is the ‘god that is visible in this world’, Debata ni ida. The bridegiving family is regarded as having a formidable power called sahala, which constitutes the source of blessings for its bridetaker in many ways. Through the gift of a daughter, the bridegiving family makes the perpetuation of the lineage of its bridetaker possible.

Its blessings during ceremonies will support its bridetaker in good times and bad times, and its material gifts will make its bridetaker prosper. The elevated status and awesome powers of the bridegiver, the hulahula, are expressed in Toba Batak proverbs (Pasaribu 2002:40-1):

Hulahula bona ni ari The hulahula is the source of daylight

Tinongonni Ompunta Mulajadi The blessing of Grandfather Mula Jadi Na Bolon Sisuboton marulak loni He who must be honoured again and again Sisobaon di rim ni tahi Worshipped from the bottom of the heart.

Hulahula mata ni ari binsar The hulahula is the light of day Sipanumak do tondina His soul power endows prosperity Sipanuai sahalana His authority bestows blessings Di nasa pomparanna on all his descendants.

The bridegiver in these proverbs is equated with Mula Jadi Na Bolon, and this image reflects again the generational hierarchy between him and his granddaughter, Si Boru Deak Parujar. We also see the hierarchy repeated in the imagery of the bridegiver as the older sibling and the bridetaker as the younger. Another metaphor equates the members of the bridetaking clan with work-buffaloes who can be called upon by the bridegiver, whenever the latter feels the need (Sherman 1987:874). How vital the support of the bridetaker is for his bridegiver can be summarized as follows: a boru fights for its hulahula in battle, raises money for the hulahula’s rituals, cooks the food offered at these rituals, and praises his hulahula in ritual speeches (Rodgers 1990:332).

The elevated status of the bridegiver also implies that the bridetaker must take the utmost care not to offend members of his bridegiver’s family. The following tale of mythical origin clarifies this. Once, a descendant of the Si Singamangaraja dynasty had betrothed his daughter to the son of his sister, in other words to his closest bridetaker.²⁹ But the marriage did not take place, because Si Singamangaraja lost a game of dice and thereupon married his daughter off to the man to whom he was indebted. His sister was so enraged because of the broken engagement that she refused to serve him, her hulahula, when he came to her village. This infuriated the Singamangaraja to such an extent that he fetched an elephant at home and went back to his sister’s village, where he let the beast trample her to death (Ypes 1932:32).

In sum, Si Boru Deak Parujar is not only the mythical creator of the earth and humanity, but she also instituted two basic principles of the Batak kinship system: by leaving her family

29 An example of the most coveted union between a father’s sister’s son (anak namboru) and a mother’s brother’s daughters (boru ni tulang), explained below (section 2.6.)

she established the exogamous nature of the marga and the hierarchical relationship between hulahula and boru. Being a woman, she was fit for the role of an intermediary between upper world and middle world and between bridegiving and bridetaking clans. As the intermediary between these two worlds, she fits neatly into the category of neither the gods nor human beings.

Being of divine origin, she remains a deity, yet she also becomes an inhabitant of the earth and gives birth to human twins. Another example of her ambiguous identity is that she has no clear-cut gender identity, which is reflected in her paraphernalia: the weaving and spinning gear normally used by women and the sword (piso horis) normally used by men. She uses her ability to spin to make the thread that allows her to descend from the upper to the middle world, and she wields the sword to slay her adversaries from the underworld. In creating the world she resembles the architect of a house, construction being a typically male occupation. She also dabbles in the magical arts, another field reserved for men (Niessen 1985:115).

In real life, a bride, forming a bridge between clans who are related as hulahula and boru, has an equally ambiguous identity. She shares with the hulahula the ability to bestow blessings on the boru: the promise of fertility, material support by her labour, and spiritual salvation. On the other hand, a woman becomes a member of the bridetaking marga, and in that capacity she shares the duties of her husband’s lineage towards her family of origin, the hulahula. In her husband’s family it is also her duty to serve. For example, she assists and supports her ageing mother- and father-in-law, not her own parents. In other words, a woman is always on call for work. Did Si Boru Deak Parujar not do all the hard work to create the world to be inhabited by human beings, to the benefit of the gods and mankind alike?

In short, a woman combines characteristics of both hulahula and boru, and her structural position falls between two marga, two well-defined social categories. Niessen makes clear what this entails: ‘because [a woman] is situated between hulahula and boru, she is associated with both, and an absolute member of neither’ (Niessen 1985:75). Niessen shows that this is also reflected in the way a woman identifies herself.

If someone asks her: ‘Boru aha do hamu? (You are boru of which marga?), she replies with the name of her father’s marga, whether she is married or not.

But if asked: Marga aha do hamu? (Which marga do you belong to?) she replies with the name of her husband’s marga.

Another reflection of ambiguity in the woman’s position is the way she is referred to after marriage by the members of her family of origin: they call her boru in the sense of ‘bridetaker’, as well as in the sense of ‘daughter’.

A woman’s affiliation with the marga of both her father and her husband is her strength and her weakness. Upon marriage she will leave her family of origin—but just as Mula Jadi Na Bolon assisted his granddaughter, a woman will never be fully relinquished by her parents and brothers, as will be elaborated in the next chapter. After marriage she stays with her husband’s marga until her death, and will be buried in his marga’s burial grounds. Nevertheless, she will never be fully incorporated into his marga. Her ambiguous status is also reflected in customary law: she has no inheritance rights in either family, precisely because she is an intermediary between patrilineal clans. This is reflected in the following image:

When a daughter is still with her parents, her right with respect to the parents is to aid. After she goes to live in her husband’s village, her right to aid is with respect to her husband. Then, if she becomes a widow, her right to aid is directed towards her son. Why? Because as long as there has been adat, the person who aids, may not inherit possessions or heirlooms. Such is the right of a mother or daughter. From her birth until she becomes a widow and then dies, her only right is to aid. (Tampulon in Niessen 1985:77)

Niessen points out that these rules reflect the formal power relations between the sexes in Toba society; but while the rules are straightforward, the practice is not. Just as Mula Jadi Na Bolon was lenient with Boru Si Deak Parujar, Batak male relatives are also expected to be compassionate. The ambiguous position of women in the kinship system, which includes their dependence on the good will of their male kin, is a significant safeguard and protection. But it is not always a sufficient shield against adversity in a woman’s life, as will become clear throughout this study.

A woman’s status as an intermediary between hulahula and boru implies that a number of rules regarding undesirable and ideal marriage have to be taken into account. These rules are by and large still relevant today and are discussed in the next two sections.