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Social lives of wounds

In document Unweaving Wounds: (pagina 31-39)

Introducing the chapter: wounds as social entities

A few days before my flight back to Amsterdam, I found myself in Karantina, a poor, relatively low-income neighborhood sitting at East of the Port of Beirut, visiting a Syrian Lebanese family. The father of the family is a Syrian man born in Lebanon. He does not have the Lebanese citizenship because his father did not have it either. He told me he has lived all his life here, has known Lebanon as his home, and cares for the country as his own. Without going further into the complex political history of citizenship laws, rights, duties and marginalization, I chose to identify this family Syrian Lebanese, as did their father, Mahmoud.

I visited the family with my cousin S. who had organized along with a group of friends a post-explosion relief fund for families heavily impacted by the blast to help them repair their damaged households. S. knew the family through the initiative she was part of since they had also been one of their aid recipients. And so, we went to Karantina.

If I want to describe how this neighborhood and, particularly, the household we visited, how it was at the epicenter of the explosion, I could show you a picture I took from the window of their bedroom. The “famous” grain silos17 appear right before your eyes along with the ships, containers and cranes. The family offered us juice and Ramadan sweets. They were fasting.

17 After the explosion, the destroyed grain silos of the Beirut port that contained a storage of large quantities of grain, made headlines. The silos had also helped minimizing the damage by cutting down the explosion waves heading towards western side of Beirut.

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We had a long conversation about frustrations, hopes, anger, disappointment, strength, courage. The parents and their children, a boy (12) and a girl (10) were all heavily wounded.

However, the main informant when it came to the living-with-wounds conversation was Amina18, the mother. Her husband spoke about disputes over NGO19 aid among neighbors, unequal aid distribution, a neighbor pretending to be wounded in order to receive monetary compensation from a non-profit organization and other frustrating issues that make him feel disappointed in his surroundings. At one point, he apologized for talking too much. Perhaps to his surprise, he was fulfilling every ethnographer’s dream. He was the one talking until I asked him about their daily life with wounds and when they feel the presence of wounds the most throughout the day. Those were the moments when he looked at me then looked at his wife, Amina, and said: “that stuff, you have to ask her, she will tell you more about it”.

Later, when Amina apologized and went to the kitchen to prepare iftar20 dinner, I told Mahmoud I want to know about aale’etkon (your relationship) with your wounds, to which he said, “oh Amina is cooking now, maybe she’ll answer better to that question”. Then, he paused a bit, lowered his voice, pointed his finger to his face:

She is suffering with the thing on her face, she’s sad about that, you know, the look. But she is also very sad with her son’s scars, you know, you saw it, it’s a lot. She’s a mother, she’s feeling it with her son…

It could be of course compelling to look into the normativities surrounding a mother-son relationship, how the mother feels or has grown and taught to feel with her mother-son. However, what captures my interest here is how the wound mediates this very relation and amplifies it.

More so, the wound contains a certain form of “affective” power which captures the emotions of those that see it from a different body. This form of affect is what “motivates” Amina to worry about and mainly take care of her son; this form of affect is what binds wounds to bodies that surround it. In this chapter, I will further explore the “becomings” of wounds as social affective entities that “have the capacity to affect and be affected” (Fox and Alldred 2017: 18).

More so, I will look into not only what these things can become but also what they can do.

Wounds not only develop and transform in interaction with other entities but also have the power to tie relations between bodies, mediate kinship, friendship and community. Wounds have social lives and are social entities.

18 All names are pseudonyms.

19 Non-governmental organizations

20 Iftar is the evening dinner during the holy month of Ramadan, with which Muslim people end their fasting of the day after sunset.

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Mediating kinship

The case I introduced above, on a mother’s concern with her son’s scars, moves me back to the very first interview I did when I visited my very first informant, Sako21, at his family home. A man in his mid-twenties, he was severely injured by the Beirut blast and he greeted me while leaning on a cane. The chat was long, both emotional and inspiring. Sako was enthusiastic and open to answering all my questions. We not only talked about his injury and recovery experience, but also fears, dreams, goals beyond the current situation, career, work and travel. With all the sensitivity surrounding wounds and scars which are the result of a massive explosion, in all the interviews I did, there was always a talk about strengths and hopes, empowerment but also anger, disappointment but also revolt.

Towards the middle of our interview, Sako’s mother joined us, and got engaged in the conversation. For every information he was giving me about daily wound-practices and healing processes, his mother was giving a more emotionally amplified testimony. High volume, raised eyebrows, eyes wide open, both hands constantly signposting parts of the body, Sako’s mother was telling me how she found her son right after the blast happened:

Ohh but now, he’s very well, you haven’t seen anything! His leg had reached his shoulder when we saw him. His shoulder! All covered in blood. Vidjaguh vidjag cher!

Vidjaguh vidjag cher is literally translated to his condition wasn’t a condition. To describe a strange, sad, tragic or annoying situation it is common to say “the situation wasn’t a situation”

a phrase that could sound empty at the surface but turns intensely meaningful when gestures, tone, articulation come into play. Perhaps this phrase is powerful because it lacks indexicality, meaning it does not point to or index to anything, it lacks a reference. It might be hard to convey exactly how revolted the mother was when talking about her son’s wounds, even though it is an ethnographer’s task to put into words what cannot be put into words; nonetheless, at that moment, the wounds got enacted as affective entities mediating affective and social relations.

In this case, wounds mediate a mother’s further attachment to her son, shaping and reshaping her affection and distress. Caring for wounds then becomes “desirable”, necessary, “natural”.

Wounds then become distress-inducing entities, entities that need care, entities that need to heal in order to bring back Sako’s vidjag (condition) to a vidjag.

When interviews happened at home, family members of informants were present, going out and about, entering and leaving the conversation. In such instances, when family members got involved into a conversation about wounds, daily practices and the overall crises of the city, it struck me how they had embodied a form of pain similar to that of the wounded body.

Already now, I was helping him, taking care of him. I was giving medication to him, cleaning the wounds. Of course, with those wounds, the other person, the person in front of him will always feel like he’s in pain and suffering, and it leaves a shock or, hmm, how can I say this,

21 Armenian name, pseudonym

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like, this feeling inside your body where you also feel the suffering. Ir tsavere yes al kashetsi (I absorbed his pain).

Hagop’s sister enters the conversation when I ask about how he took care of his wounds. She sits there next to him expressing herself with a sad form of excitement. She is the one who took care of him, cleaned the wounds, gave him medication, but most importantly she has felt the pain, shared the suffering too. Wounds carry an affective resonance that allows them to

“transcend” bodies and bodily “boundaries” (Haraway 1991: 201). Other, non-wounded bodies that live in proximity with wounds and share the same space with wounds, that come close, see, touch, feel, take care of or worry about wounds, embody a sort of pain or suffering as well.

Hence, at one point, wounds mediate relationships between wounded and non-wounded bodies in daily wound-practices and situations and at another, they enact the fluidity of bodily boundaries. What Harout experiences in terms of pain and woundedness is not enclosed to his own body but transcends to her sister’s, who gets “this feeling inside her body to feel suffering”. And this fluidity between the bodies and the kinship affectivity is mediated by and transmitted through wounds. After all, our bodies “neither stop nor start at the skin” (Haraway 1991: 215).

Mediating community

On a daily basis, my informants and their family members apply creams, clean, disinfect, medicate “their” wounds. However, there are more people who enter the world of wounds to bring care, comfort, attention and solidarity. Friends, acquaintances, neighbors, photographers, members of organizations, reconstructive surgeons, dermatologists all surround wounds, talk and think about, get concerned about and give care to wounds. It is therefore interesting to examine how wounds, these affective, fluid entities, mediate these community encounters, are always “becoming” through these engagements and in return shaping and transforming these relations. In the interviews I conducted with my informants, they told me about pharmacist-neighbors and doctor-friends who came to disinfect wounds and change up the gauze, there was an architect friend who had created a table for an informant so she can eat in bed, there was an acquaintance who had come to wash an informant’s hair after their surgery, a tante22 that brings medication, a group of alumni from the informant’s high school who covered his physiotherapy sessions, colleagues and coworkers who reached out to drive informants to checkups and second surgeries. One of my key informants, Racha, whom I met at a cozy café in Badaro, a lovely neighborhood in the vicinities of Beirut, spoke about how living with wounds was “easier than she thought”; the main reason for that was because of her entourage and the support she received from friends and loved ones.

22 Tante translates to auntie (from French). In Lebanon it is common to use “aunt” and “uncle” in order to connote, an older person, who might be a friend to the family, or lives nearby or even a complete stranger to whom you want to show respect and affection.

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Eh I think it went better than I thought, when I think about it, I was bien entourée (well surrounded), the people, my support system was really amazing, everyone around me tells me all the time that I look good and they [the scars] look good, and honestly having a boyfriend helped me at the time, also because of the intimacy with the body and so I didn’t have to explain my injury to someone new because he was there, he knew about that, it was nice… And there are two photographers who came to my house, you saw the picture of YH and my best friend, she’s also a photographer, she came and took pictures. These things were my way to express and to talk about what happened to me and so it helped me seeing the photos online and you know people commenting… I don’t usually seek attention but this time I felt that I needed it. It felt like I needed people to tell me [encouraging words], it felt good to have them encouraging, saying like these scars are amazing, je sais pas (I don’t know), the pictures are amazing. It felt good.

Here a few things happen to wounds as Racha highlights the importance of a “support system”

in her recovery process. At first, people come in contact with wounds and engage in active conversations about these things, and through these interactions, wounds become worthy, beautiful entities. Secondly, getting intimate with a wounded body gives acceptance to the wounds, negates their “strangeness”, renders them “normal”. Moreover, this data excerpt shows the impact photographs of wounds and their circulation has on these entities and the person carrying it. The wound has an “affective capacity” (Fox and Alldred 2017: 30) to stir a conversation, capture attention and tie wounded and non-wounded bodies in community.

Additionally, this example also shows how photographers and their photographs have entered wound-assemblages and have contributed in enlarging the conversations surrounding the status of wounds by sharing their work online. While wounds are the entities tying these conversations and relations, cameras become important tools in allowing these mediations to happen. Following this, strangers online have entered into a relation with wounds by leaving comments, giving opinions, saying words of encouragement, admiration and appreciation.

“The reason behind this shoot is to aid in the healing process without belittling the pain and suffering of its participants” writes a photographer on his public page on Instagram. Wounds, wound-carriers, photographers, cameras, commentators, photographs, Instagram all become part of a wound-assemblage. Through this all these entities transform and develop, and wounds and their carriers become different things as I show some excerpts below:

scars are proof and stories of rebirth beautiful warrior

how many scars do we need to bear until we can claim our skin as our own?

I am sure your photographs will turn scars into something divine battle scars

these beauties

my scars are my story

You survived the biggest non-nuclear explosion in history. Those scars are symbols of endurance and strength.

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those scars made you prettier I love scars!

warriors heroes

Yes, it’s time to celebrate our strengths!

These comments are from different Instagram posts. These comments are expressed by strangers, who come in solidarity, who appreciate, love, celebrate and applaud wounds and their carriers. Wounds become heroic, beautiful, “divine” entities, carrying stories of rebirth, a proof of survival and source of strength. They materialize as beautiful entities once the photographs surface and catch the gaze of user online, who are nothing but touched, affected, shook by these images. This further shows the situatedness and “becomings” of wounds through different practices and in relation to numerous entities, from cameras to photographers, medication to pharmacist-friends, creams to mothers. Not only do wounds become but also

“do”. In turn, wounds as affective social entities, they connect people, establish social ties, create newer communities online and offline. Wounds mediate community.

Finally, during my fieldwork and through it, I also entered wound-assemblages and became part of these communities, being captivated by the complexity of wounds. During the interviews I conducted, the wounds were “becoming” also in relation to me. Here is an excerpt from a conversation I was having with Hagop, who talked about the care he received at the hospital and the form of relationship he developed with his wounds later on.

They said at the hospital that the stitching we’re doing for you is not about the aesthetic, there isn’t any time for the aesthetic, because there were hundreds, thousands of injured like me waiting, there was no time, and they explained to me later that, “sorry”, the place of the stitches might stay visible. It might leave a mark. Now, generally, only this stayed [showing the scar on his forehead], my face was way worse than this, but it all went away, and the doctor said that we gave attention the most to your face, we worked more precisely there… I also said it is fine doctor, katter kheyrkon (bless you) you were able to help so many people, many people like me, so I understand them, the doctors… Like I said, it wasn’t so easy had my face stayed like that, I was very scared but I always tried to convince myself that okay, I’m a guy, with all due respect to you, but, you know girls are more like, umm, they don’t want it, sorry for saying this, but I thought, you know, whatever happens, it’s not a big problem, the most important thing is that God kept me alive, I’m still on my feet…

In relation to me, a woman, the wounds on Hagop’s (a man) face, transformed here into gendered entities. In the pressing moments when doctors, nurses, physicians, medical staff and medical students were all faced with the harsh reality of providing care in crisis, one thing was clear: aesthetics did not matter. Aesthetics were not supposed to matter. Of course, many of the injured, like Hagop were aware and were never but thankful to the fast care they received.

In following the social lives of wounds, the question of gender surely pops up. The appearance of wounds is not only a medical or aesthetic matter. Wounds are social entities as they mobilize

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gendered appearance. The other men that I spoke to, also mentioned briefly how they did not have a lot of problem with appearance and thought that this is because they are not women.

Scars need to get concealed sometimes but on which bodies? Perhaps a topic to explore in the future. What remains from this section is how wounds mobilize and get mobilized by social relations. Through the interactions of wounded and non-wounded bodies, wounds become affective, social, desirable, discardable, aesthetic and gendered entities.

Community initiatives: wounds and laser treatments

In the previous paragraphs, I observe how wounds tie together different people, wounded and non-wounded, transcend bodies, stir conversations, create community. In this section, I turn my focus to specific community initiatives where wounds were at the center of the work and conversation: laser treatments. After the Beirut blast, many hospital departments, private clinics, medical centers, reconstructive surgeons and dermatologists came up with these community initiatives that consist of giving free or partially discounted medical advice, treatment, consultation and medical therapy. Following the social lives of wounds, in this section I focus on these initiatives to further grasp what wounds become and how they get mobilized through such action. Moreover, I also explore how such initiatives and community interactions carry an influence on the appearance of wounds.

A call to Beirut blast victims! Book your free consultation with our department of dermatology… Together we heal the scars.

A dermatology department at a private hospital puts up announcements for those who got wounded during the Beirut blast to get in touch for a free consultation in order to get a treatment. Many other similar initiatives get advertised and circulate the news. This pushes many to seek the help and the treatments being offered. I learned about these events through one of my key informants, Taline, who had started a laser session only for her face a couple of weeks before I met with her. She talked about how she likes keeping her scars because they are not something you can erase, “you cannot erase what happened, it’s history, I like it”. But for the ones on her face, in a way she felt obliged and took responsibility for her future self:

“maybe in 10 years, I might regret for not doing it [laser treatment] when I had the chance”. It is captivating how the advertisement above reveals the affective capacity of wounds and their power to bring “together” different people, wounded and non-wounded. Other advertisement of similar campaigns and initiatives read:

Do you know someone whose face scars need treatment? Share this post and Tag them! With our Laser Scar Revision Treatment, we leave those scars and bad memories behind.

Some scars won’t heal with Time…

They heal with our Laser Scar Revision Treatment.

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With our laser scar revision treatment, we can quickly and safely leave those scars behind.

Please tag and share to find the faces of Beirut. #FaceofBeirut

In the first advertisement, the call is addressed not only to blast victims but those surrounding them. To heal wounds and take care of wounded bodies, many people get involved. A collective

“we”. Wounds, these very personal entities, become collective entities. By tagging and sharing, many people enter into wound-assemblages where they collectively shape the development and status of wounds and in return get affected by wounds.

Further analyzing these advertisements, I ask myself what else do these initiatives make of wounds? Here, healing of wounds and their (in)visibility gets equated. When I met my informants, many of them claimed they had healed physically even though their scars still appeared on their skin. Here, the wounds are meant to be healed by the laser treatment meaning that they are meant to be rendered invisible. Moreover, wounds here become bad memories, meant to stay in the past, meant to be concealed, so that the person who carries it heals along with a collective “we”. Here, not only do wounds mediate community but they become communal, collective entities, where their dis/appearance gets debated beyond the wounded bodies.

In one of the advertisement videos for one of the laser care clinics, a woman talked about her experience before and after receiving the laser therapy treatment. She said she is thankful for having done this, since every time she had looked in the mirror and seen her scars, she remembered the explosion, the shocking scenes, and what “they” did to the people. Here, it is crucial to think how the form, the appearance and the location of the wound, acts on what becomes of them. In certain situations, wounds become things meant to go away, in other situations, they are shown off to make statements and their healing is not related to their concealment.

Concluding remarks

In this chapter, I looked into how wounds mediate relations between wounded and non-wounded as they have affective capacities. I observed these relations in the household between family members. After which, I investigated how friends, reconstructive surgeons, pharmacists, dermatologists, doctors, photographers, and audiences online all enter the world of wounds, transforming it and being transformed by it. Wounds become “material-semiotic nodes” (Haraway 1991: 200) tying together communities. As I conclude this chapter, I leave the conversation related to the community initiatives open, as I will look further into how wounds mediate communities, movements, actions that make the wounded city, in the third empirical chapter Wounds make the wounded city.

In document Unweaving Wounds: (pagina 31-39)